I Would Like To Be An Eccentric Old Lady
/The best time to be extravagant is when you are old, it might actually save your life and keep you alive and entertained for quite some time.
In her biography, the American comedian Jessi Klein states in a funny way that a woman can only age "glamorous" in three ways: if she is a top model (and by that automatically, she will become an ex-top model, preserving her status as a diva) if she is extremely rich (and can afford to buy eternal youth through a privileged status and a daily Hermes wardrobe) or the last option and the one that made me smile and wonder if I can become one ….if she is eccentric. But she has to make a statement clarifying that she is an eccentric woman…with an ostrich sewed on her purple dress or any other statement that she wants to make and will propel as the eccentric one!
I am not an extravagant person myself and I have never had a great spirit of rebellion, but by projecting myself in 30-40 years, this option sounds awesome! For me being an eccentric woman in my 80s, doesn't mean I will wear fluorescent leggings or pink animal print, but moreover I will be inspired to have a different approach to life. A recalibration that defies everything the world expects or thinks a woman "d'un certain age" should be like.
Elderly women almost always confess that they don't have the looks anymore and somewhere deep down in their heart they don't even want someone to look at them. In a way, they feel overlooked but on the other hand, they feel they have nothing more to show to the world. In Romania, my home country, more than in any other parts of the world, I often encountered this phrase: "At my age…", followed by many stereotypes: I can't do this/ I can't wear this/ it's not normal to act like this. Honestly, this makes me so sad, because even though, my grandma (which is 80 by the way) went alone last year on a trip for 3 weeks, also came to visit me in the Netherlands (again, alone!), knows how to use a laptop and to browse for things on Google or to video call with me on Skype, still has this mindset that for example, "I am an old woman, and I can't do this anymore" when I asked her to dance with me in my living room. In the end, she still did it, but just because nobody saw her except me.
But a true eccentric woman will be one of those characters that are not afraid to be seen or express her own thoughts. That woman is not afraid to wear a funny hat just because she likes it a loooot! She will not easily give up something that she loves, or gives her pleasure, just because when she was young, someone lied to her and told her that, "only the young ones have the right or privilege to express themselves like this and the old ones should be silent and with a bowed head.”
When I was a little kid, my friends and I used to meet up in the park and it was usually accompanied by our grandmothers some of which were being called "crazy old women" because they used to dress up with high heels, funny hats, wearing red lipstick or floral dresses. I could argue that in some cases it was a bit too much, but you have to appreciate the respect that those women had for themselves. This was happening in the late 80s when the concept of being old was even more outdated than it is now.
Now that I think about them, I want to smile, because those women were even more extravagant than all Iris Apfel lookalike characters of nowadays. Probably nobody ever told them that they were "courageous”, and nobody ever looked at them with admiration on the streets, but rather they only heard bad remarks which were definitely undeserved. But, even so, they had their style and they were proud and ambitious women and didn't give up at what became today "the eccentric style". Cheers to them and their courage to stand up for what they believed in and loved so much. Those "crazy old women" were eccentric in a world when the term itself didn't exist for the young generation, rather than for old-fashioned ones, so basically, they invented the word "eccentric". they were the cool avant-la-lettre.
One of my favorite eccentric women nowadays is Lyn Slater, the accidental icon, who said “People are talking about, as you age, you get very invisible. But for me, I’ve never been more visible in my entire life”, therefore when I am going to be old, and by that, I mean biologically old, not according to the standard definitions nowadays, where at 50 you are already old - I would like to be still seen and heard. I don't want to be silenced just because I am not in my 20s or 30s anymore. I want to be able to say that I am the improved version of what I am today and to be able to live my life as I pleased without any stereotypes surrounding me. And if I will fell the need to wear an ostentatious hat, a big statement elegant brooch or a multicolored peacock print on my shoulder, then so be it!
Eccentricity means different things to everybody, but in essence, it is a different form of courage. It means to be able to think that your soul is still 20 years old and act upon that, without behaving the way you’re supposed to according to your age. And if that means to be a "crazy old woman" then I cannot wait to take my grandchildren to and from the kindergarten in an haute-couture dress while wearing my matching funny purple hat.
All jokes aside, to be an eccentric woman in her 80s for me will mean that:
- I will be studying again - university, master or Ph.D.; or learning a new language or getting my certification for a pottery course I finished, or in order to be up to date with the technology nowadays and in the future, maybe designing a robot or creating algorithms for social media platforms, these would be my ways of being eccentric, because you never know what will happen in 30-40 years. I want to keep my mind sharp until the last second of my life.
- To create a fashion travel blog called "the 60+ outfit of the day" and promote elderly beauty on Instagram by showing the outfit of the day while working on my plan to travel everywhere. To be enthusiastic every day for each new "like" I get and to always have something to look forward to.
- To be open-minded and serene by enjoying the young generation’s company and to try to understand their way of doing things, rather then I have the absolute truth and I know better and they owe me everything.
- To continue to experiment and not to be embarrassed to wear colored clothing or to go skydiving. To continuously want new things in my life and to smile every morning when I look in the mirror. To let my style, evolve, not to make it disappear in the old age neutrality.
To be eccentric, extravagant, and alive for me it means that in 30-40 years, I will be 30-40 times wiser, serene, and happy with myself compared to how I am today. I want to be cooler, and more evolved in any area of interest.
No matter how wrinkled my face will be and how white my hair will be, my life has gone in the direction I wanted - evolution!
